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- š Geopolitics and Garlic Knots: A Normal Monday š
š Geopolitics and Garlic Knots: A Normal Monday š
OpenAI lawsuits, pentagon pizza traffic, and 5 new AI tools to round it out.

Good morning. We just watched the Pentagon leak a missile strike via pizza orders.
OpenAI got sued and Goldman Sachs gave 10,000 suits access to their own AI.
In other words: the vibes are unstable, the tools are multiplying, and even Papa Johns is doing OSINT now.
Letās dig in.
š Whatās Cookinā:
Pentagon pizza surge tips off U.S. strike on Iran
OpenAI pulls Jony Ive promo after trademark smackdown
5 AI tools to clip, rewrite, launch, and dominate
Another banger FREE PROMPT
And Everything Else You Need to Know
š Steal This Prompt
šø The Blackwater Close-Up
This portrait prompt gives you that grayscale glow-up.
Shadowed, serious, and suspiciously genius.
Think tech founder meets noir thriller. Youāre not sad⦠just dramatic.
Turn your face into a moody, Oscar-bait movie poster.
Click this link (prompt)
Paste into GPT
Swap # with the subject.
If you use a reference, which you should, just replace # with āperson in the image referencedā
Let the cinematic tension do its thing
š Try the prompt on Snack Prompt š

Pizza > CNN
š Pentagon Pizza Orders Predicted Todayās Iran Strike
The Bite: Yesterdayās biggest intel didnāt come from CNN. It came from a Papa Johns near the Pentagon.
It came straight from Papa Johns near the Pentagon.
Minutes before mainstream reports about an Iranian retaliation of U.S. missile strike on Iranian sites, internet watchers were already raising eyebrows at a spike in pizza orders around key D.C. spots.
Welcome to the Pentagon Pizza Index: where mozzarella meets military ops.
Snacks:
PenPizzaReport flagged āHIGHā pizza traffic near the Pentagon at 12:10pm ET
Freddieās Beach Bar, a popular Pentagon watering hole, had unusually low foot traffic
Pizza spikes predicted Israeli strikes last month too
First spotted in the ā90s during Desert Storm
Google Maps data = the new geopolitical Bloomberg Terminal
Why it bites: This isnāt a meme.
Itās crowdsourced OSINT with marinara sauce.
If Dominoās is our new war correspondent, weāre either entering a golden age of transparency⦠or the worldās dumbest apocalypse.
Jokes aside, in a world drowning in spin, bots, and propaganda,
pepperoni and cheesy breadsticks might just be the purest information source weāve got left.


Can you tell which image is real? |


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OpenAI
āļø OpenAI's $6.5B Jony Ive Hype Video Gets Yanked
The Bite: OpenAI just deleted its promo video for io; the secretive AI hardware startup backed by $6.5B and designed by Apple legend Jony Ive.
Not because the deal collapsed (it hasnāt), but because a judge hit them with a restraining order over the name io, after another startup, iyO, filed a trademark complaint.
Snacks:
The video hyped Sam Altman + Jony Iveās AI device collab
A court says the io name may violate iyOās trademark
iyO came out of Googleās incubator, now makes AI earbuds
OpenAI pulled the video from YouTube + its site (still up on X)
Deal is āon track,ā per Bloomberg, despite the legal hiccup
Why it bites: This was supposed to be OpenAIās āone more thingā moment.
Jony Ive, billions in funding, and a shot at redefining hardware.
Now itās tangled up over a name that looks like a password typo.
Great design starts with details⦠but maybe also with a trademark lawyer?

EVERYTHING ELSE
š§ You Need to Know
Goldman Sachs deploys AI for 10,000 staff
ā The new GS AI Assistant helps summarize docs, draft content, and analyze data part of a broader finance AI arms race.
Google powers up Chromebook Plus with Gemini tools
ā New features include screen-based search, AI image edits, and a āSimplifyā button that makes dense text actually readable.
New Zealand identifies $3.4B AI goldmine by 2035
ā A new report calls for investment in apps + datacentres, not moonshots. Think local, train global, export smart.
FedEx tackles āthe final bossā of warehouse AI
ā Itās testing robots to load and unload loose-packed trucks ā a puzzle most bots still rage-quit.
HIVE buys 7.2 MW data center in Toronto
ā The crypto miner is going full AI, planning 5,000 GPUs and sovereign infrastructure for Canadaās digital future.
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